


Classifieds

by KMissouri



Category: Code Geass, Futurama, Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Alternate Universe, Cross-Generational Friendship, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Crossover, Gen, Humor, Medical Experimentation, Medication, Mild Language, Other, Robot/Human Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-27
Updated: 2014-08-03
Packaged: 2018-02-10 16:01:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2031216
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KMissouri/pseuds/KMissouri
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Enter the life of young Suzaku Kururugi, who has to deal with jerks on one hand and even more on the other. But that is only part of the reason for his depressing life, but just when you think it can't get any worse, he finds himself without a job.</p>
<p>Now sitting unemployed and at risk of eviction, the only good friends of his comes to him with an amazing job opportunity; at first, it all goes swimmingly well when he manages to get the job but is dumbfounded once he learns that's he's working for - a phamaceutical company.</p>
<p>His situation is made any better by his boss ~ Bender. A chain smoking, binge drinking, hedonistic, thieving, sadistic robot who originates from the the future. His mission - to create high end drugs for no reason other than money. He's accompanied by his assistant ~ Alexandra Cabot. A detective who works as Bender's right hand and manages all of the company's affairs, while trying to control her boss.</p>
<p>Now part of a bunch of alleged misfits, Suzaku tries to familiarize himself with a profession he has no experience in, all while he tries to adjust himself with a completely odd, yet dysfuctional work enviroment. Subtle as it may be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. From Bad to Worse

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, and welcome to the first chapter of my newest fan-fic series. I'll keep it short and sweet. All you need to know is that I've been working on this since last year and I'm working really hard to make this funny. Chapters will be posted every one or two weeks, and that shoud be it.
> 
> So I hope you enjoy it as much as I have. If not, that's fine too.

_It was here in the New York City borough of Queens, on November 1, 2012 where a young man named Suzaku Kururugi arrived to his job early at around 9 am on this particular day. It was a simple desk job of his that mainly required him to sit at a desk for most of the day. There were a couple of people that he knew personally, but he has strained his friendships to maintain his professionalism at work. But in all honesty, this gentleman has nothing but discontent with his life._

_A young Japanese man in his early twenties waking up everyday to take the subway from Brooklyn to Queens, then walk for an hour combined, only to arrive at a stressful, boring, useless job where almost no one likes him and the only thing that (barely) keeps him there is the money. Cue the violins. Keep them going for a little longer, will ya? But sitting at a cubicle for almost the entire day, dealing with zombies fueled by caffeine, women who are shallow to their toe nails (except one who is genuinely kind) and a best friend who needs a lot of explaining. And we mean **a lot**._

_Today could be considered the day that changed this man's life for the better – or worse._

It was approximately 11 am on this day where Suzaku was typing up data sheets over at his desk, with the mellow tune of jazz in the background for relaxation. He believed that the more he worked, the faster time went ahead. It helped a little. As he was half way finished, he got a phone call.

He picked up the phone and answered, “Hello?”

“ _Oh hello, Suzaku. Are you busy?” said a female voice._

“I don't know, Kallen.” he replied with sarcasm, “It's not like I'm here at work or anything. I love risking my job to talk to you”

“ _Don't get smart with me. Or else I'll slap you through the phone.” she snarled; getting back to the point, Kallen asked him, “Have you seen Lelouch recently? I haven't spoken to him in the last few days.”_

“Well I hate to say this, but I haven't. Even _if_ , why should I give a damn? He's causes endless problems for me.” he told her, prepared to hang up the phone.

But he didn't actually. In fact, she shouted at him at presumably the last second and told him with concern,  _ “Please, help me. Last time I spoke to him, he was angry at you guys' boss.” _

“I know that he was angry, but I hate to tell you but I don't speak to him at work, so I don't know what's going on.”

“ _Well figure out what's going on. Because I fear what he going to do.”_

Scratching his head, Suzaku told her frankly, “I really hate it when you use me for crap like this.”

“ _Well you know what? I hate you too!” she shouted, “Screw you and everything that is related to you.”_

“You must have a short fuse or something, because nothing gets me through my mundane life with your random outbursts.” he chuckled, until he looked above his cubicle and saw Lelouch doing something in their boss' office. This drew suspicion to which he said, “I gonna have to call you back.”

Suzaku hung up the phone and left his desk; he quickly confronted Lelouch soon after he exited the office. He tried to be inconspicuous as he walked out but Suzaku was standing right there to see what he was doing; the moment he noticed him standing here, he reacted as if he saw a ghost.

“Oh greetings, Suzaku! Didn't see you standing there.”

He was given a blank look, not saying a thing. But Lelouch got up and walked away without a word. Suzaku wondered what it was that he did while he was there. So he entered the office and came across a suspicious looking device; at this point he didn't want to believe that he would stoop so low (but he probably would). He approached it and the closer he got to it, the faster it started to beep. His heart started racing, fearing what it may do.

Out of sheer curiosity, he put his hand on it. Clearly he wasn't using his brain because something happened once he touched it. Apparently it turns out the second he does this, the device detonated and in no less than a second, the entire room is covered in blue paint. Everything from important files, to Suzaku himself was covered in paint. This loud explosion was hear by almost everyone around, to where they all ran to the office to see what had happened.

The boss of the company ran to see that his files and every personal thing of his is covered in paint, and nearly lost his breath. Suzaku was surprised that he was still standing, considering that he was absurdly close to it. The man looked at him with such anger that was hardly describable, while Suzaku couldn't figure a thing to say. In retrospect, he should have stayed out of it.

But somehow he mustered something out of his mouth, “I had nothing to do with this, I swear.”

* * *

 

It was barely 1 pm that day when Suzaku's boss chewed him out heavily, accidentally breaking something that belonged to his employees, and to finish it all – he fires him. Apparently the device only detonated by contact, but luckily it was  _ just _ paint and not something even worse. Despite multiple attempts at defending himself, he refused to hear any of it and fired him, without even giving the rest of the day – or allowing him to pack up his stuff.

The rest of the day got a little more worse than it did when it began. It started raining, he missed his ride back home, and well it may sound mean but to make it a little more unbearable, a nearby couple were arguing with the wife throwing a blunt object at the husband, only for it to hit Suzaku instead. A group of fifth graders laughing at him didn't help at all. As he walked into the nearest drug store to buy some hair dye (since his hair is now drenched in blue paint), he wondered why all that happened to him.

Because it did.

Now early in the evening, Suzaku was back home in Brooklyn washing the paint out of his hair, then dyed it back to its original color. He wondered how in the hell did something like that get him fired in the first place; even though he did no wrong, the least that should have came out of it was a suspension. Either way, it still didn't change the fact that he is now unemployed – just like many Americans.

As he exited the bathroom, drying his hair with a towel, his phone rang again. Just like before, it was Kallen. He knew exactly what she wanted and even though he wants to help her with something, he wasn't in the mood to hear her talk about the same man who got him fired. As a matter of fact, he didn't want to hear her talk regardless. Nevertheless, he answered the phone with the sound of stress in his voice.

“Hello? What is it this time?”

“ _Oh hi. I heard you got fired earlier today.”_

“Did you call to see how I was doing?” he inquired.

“ _Oh no, I was planning on ridiculing you since you deserve it.”_

“I'm not surprised that you would say something like that. Besides, how did you find out in the first place?”

“ _Lelouch told me all about it an hour ago. He found the whole thing amusing – as did I.”_

At that point, he was a disgruntled when he heard his name; so he took the chance to tell her what actually happened, “You do realize that it's his fault I got fired in the first place.”

“ _He would never do that. Stop blaming others for your crap!”_

“I know you two have a history, and it's really clouding your judgment. But you know what, I'm not the one to say this, but leave me alone and stop calling me.”

“ _Don't you dare hang up the pho-”_ Her sentence was cut off, as he intentionally ended the call and tossed the phone on the couch. At this point, he sat down and thought about what he could possibly do at this point. Suzaku was in a difficult situation and is in need of some help – but he doesn't have anyone to turn to. This is going to be a problem.

* * *

 

Fifteen days into unemployment, Suzaku has been trying to gather whatever money he has around so he can make it through until he finds a new job. There were bills that needed to be paid; such as water, electricity (yes, even apartments residents pay for lights), and some types of communication. He was fine with bathroom essentials for the time being, but food would soon become a problem. There was one thing that he was forgetting that he didn't take into account.

And he was about to find out. While he was doing some important paperwork, he heard someone knocking on the door. He went over to see who it was and much to his displeasure, it was the landlord trying to tell him something of discomfort. He didn't understand why he was there to begin with, but he was about to find out.

He opened to door and was greeted by the angry expression of the landlord, as he greeted, “Oh hello, sir. What brings you along?”

The landlord was not subtle with him, and told him straight-forward, “Where's my money?”

Suzaku looked at him with some confusion and replied, “What money? I don't owe you anything.”

“You haven't paid your rent in two months.”

He was dumbfounded when realized that he forgot about the rent. “Huh? So that's what I was forgetting? I'm sorry if I haven't been able to pay you. However, I recently lost my job and I'm trying to figure out a way to make things work.”

He was not buying it – even if it was true. In fact, he started to belittle him for the little 'sob story' of his, “Oh boo hoo. Do you need a napkin and some apple sauce, pussy? Don't give me excuses.”

“I'm not giving you an excuse. Times have been tough recently.” he rebutted, while maintaining his calm demeanor.

“Well I sympathize with you and what you're going through. But don't expect to duck me forever.”

“Alright then, I understand. But I still don't know how I expect to pay you.”

Since he was bargaining with a man who has seen this too many times before, the landlord came up with somewhat of a compromise. To which he explained, “Tell you what, I'll let you stay here for the rest of the month. However, if you don't have the last two months and next month's rent in cash by the first of December, then I'm throwing your ass out.”

His situation went from bad to worse from there, so Suzaku argued as the landlord walked away, “How in the hell am I supposed to come up with twenty five hundred dollars in two weeks?”

“Figure something out, or start learning to live in a tent.”

And that is when he needed to act fast. Really fast. A day goes by since the talk and now Suzaku must come up with at least twenty five hundred dollars in two weeks max. To some, this isn't much of a problem; but this is New York. Chances are he may run into more assholes than nice people. He had serious issues with this – mainly because of a few reasons. Since his recent employer derailed him, he isn't able to get unemployment benefits. And that won't help him any.

That doesn't happen often, but in his case it did. Secondly, he couldn't take out a loan since those are never a good idea to begin with. Lastly, he couldn't find  _ anyone _ that would pay him to do  anything . In short, his only option was to sell drugs or himself. But he took a different approach and decided to go out looking for a job in the classifieds section. It can easily be said that he's a workaholic, so anything is better than nothing.

The goal was to find a job that would pay him almost the exact amount he needed. But he neglected to discover was that there wasn't many jobs that would pay someone that much in one month (or two weeks), in fact the only high end jobs wouldn't employ someone with limited experience. Overall, he wasted about a week of his time with resumes, interviews and job searching only to come up with nothing in the end.

* * *

 

Twenty five days into unemployment we find him sitting alone in some park in Manhattan (don't remember which one; but it's not those two), wondering how he would handle life on the streets. Suzaku has given up entirely. This poor bastard barely has less than half of the money he needs, and the landlord is just provoking him for the fun of it. There was no way he could come up with the money to stay in his apartment and he has completely run out of options.

Sitting on a park bench, his eyes were mainly glued to a book of his. He looked up momentarily and saw two familiar faces nearby, but he quickly looked down to avoid them spotting him. However, he was too late as they noticed him from afar. Surprised to see him after so long, they walked over so they could talk; although he didn't feel like doing so.

One of them, a female, spoke out, “Hi, Suzaku. Haven't seen you in months. Why are you sitting out here by yourself?”

“Huh?” he replied, only hearing part of it. He looked up and saw two of his old co-workers, with smiles on their faces. He smiled back and greeted, “Oh hey, Cecile. Hello, Lloyd. You look... pretty much the same.”

“Your compliment is making me blush. But what about you? You look like you've been to hell, then back.” Lloyd remarked, although his ordeal has put him through such.

She glared at Lloyd and sat right next to Suzaku and said, “We heard you got fired weeks ago. We haven't heard from you since.”

“It's not a big deal.” he sighed, “I didn't like it there anyways.”

“What are you saying? It is a big deal!” she objected, “We know your friend did it, we know you're innocent.”

“He's the only one that day that was in the factory that day.” Lloyd noted, “However, I don't understand how you got fired for that? Seems a little disproportional if you ask me.”

It was a good thing that they believed his story, but it didn't change anything. He got up and told them, “I appreciate you two coming in and cheering me up, but to be honest, I'm in a much difficult situation. I'm about to get evicted if I don't come up with three month's worth of rent.”

“And you're still unemployed?” she inquired; Suzaku nodded in agreement, to which she argued, “That's crazy! Anyone would be happy to have a hard worker like you.”

“That's sweet, Cecile. But right now, I need to find some way to come up with more than two thousand by next month.”

She understood his situation all too well, she knew that there was something that they could do for him. Cecile grabbed Lloyd and carried him to the side so they could talk in private. He knew that he was in need of some help – and a job. She instructed him to stand as is while she and Lloyd talked.

“Lloyd, we should probably let him know.” she whispered.

“About what?”

“About our other job. Maybe they'll hire him.”

Although he wanted to help out a fellow friend, he had some objections. “I don't know. He doesn't like it when we bring outsiders in.” he replied.

“Please, Lloyd. Back me up on this. He needs our help. And besides, he would be working with us again and for an amazing boss.”

Despite his feelings towards the idea, out of nowhere a burst of enthusiasm came out of him and he agreed, “Let's do this for him!”

They turned around and approached Suzaku once again. He remained where he was but he did hear some of what they were saying behind his back, something was telling him that none of this would turn out well at all. It didn't help either of them when they smiled at him as they walked back to speak to him.

“Suzaku, we might have an opportunity for you after all.” Lloyd told him.

There was very little enthusiasm in his voice, as he raised his eye brow and replied, “Really? What kind of job can you give me?”

Cecile grabbed his arm and told him, “Follow us. We'll show you.”

With that being said, they took him away so that they could provide assistance to his situation. Along the way, Lloyd and Cecile told him about a job opportunity that would assist him in his time of need. They didn't discuss pay, nor did they describe where it is or what type of job it supposed to be. He somewhat feared that they were going to put him to work as either a drug dealer or worse, a male prostitute. At least the latter pays well.

* * *

 

They traveled all the way to Staten Island where they led him to a strange looking building. It looked old, abandoned and was home to many rodents; one of which tried to crawl up his pants. At this point, he thought the very worse. Suzaku resisted at first when they told him to enter. And it got a little more scary as they closed and locked the door. This wasn't the surprise. Lloyd went down to one knee to activate what looked like a sensory device. He activated it by placing his hand on it, and soon after a large transportation tube came out of the ground. To translate – an escalator.

Lloyd, Cecile and Suzaku walked inside and within minutes, they were transported down below. As soon as they reached their destination, he was presented by a large underground facility. All of it was too amazing for him, as there were robots walking around, everything looked high tech and futuristic. It all looked like something out of a movie. In some way, they believed that they were doing the right thing by bringing him here.

They approached one door, with Lloyd walking inside. As they waited for him to return, Suzaku asked Cecile, “What the hell is this place?”

Cecile took a couple steps back and told him, “Suzaku, this is our secret job.”

“You guys are secret agents or something?”

“Not necessarily. We're actually a secret company.”

“What do you guys do?” he asked.

“We'll let you know in a second.” Cecile replied, “But I need you to understand that this is no ordinary job. We may be secret but we put in a lot of work.”

“Okay. But tell me this.” he asked boldly, “How come Lloyd is in there talking to the boss alone?”

“The thing is, he doesn't like unexpected guests in here. Right now he is trying to state a perfectly good case for you.”

“He's really doing that for me?”

“I hope he is.” she shrugged.

One minute later, Lloyd walked out virtually the same way he entered. He stared at them for a little while, until he welcomed him inside. Suzaku was a bit nervous, but Cecile encouraged him to walk inside to meet the boss. As he walked inside, he saw nobody inside. He looked around to see if there was anyone around, and after standing there for at least a few minutes, he was prepared to walk away. But right as he headed towards the door...

He heard a male voice from afar, which greeted him, “You! Are you the one looking for a job?”

Suzaku turned back around and approached the chair; he answered, “Uh... yes. Are you the one in charge of this place?”

“In charge? I run this place. I founded this company.” he told him.

For some reason, this looked shady. He stood there waiting for him to say anything else. But right before Suzaku could say another word, the boss turned the chair around. And much to his surprise, he found out that he isn't even human – but a robot. Suzaku was both shocked and bewildered as he saw it right before his eyes.

“Y-You're a robot?!” he stammered.

The robot chuckled and replied, “Yeah, I'm a robot. No surprise... maybe to you but now you know of my existence, sit your ass down so we can talk.”

“Okay.” he nodded. A chair was placed behind him and he sat down. He asked, “What is this place anyways?”

“I'm glad to tell you.” he said, getting up out of his chair and introduced, “This is _Bendco_ , a secret company run by me, Bender. So are you interested in a job?”

“Uh yes. If there's anything available, then I'll willing to take it.”

Bender again chuckled at his determination to do almost anything. He was aware that he needed some work and was willing to give it to him, however he decided to ask him one question, “Okay, I understand you need this job as you are in quite a crappy situation, but here's a quick question – do you have any knowledge of chemistry and/or know how to take orders?”

“I used to study chemistry, before I somehow got into business.” he told him, “And yes, I'm highly subordinate.”

“You know business as well?” Bender said in disbelief, “I could use someone like you. But I have one more question – like I said earlier, you need a job. But considering that you have no information, much less a resume. So answer this – you can go on all day about how you need this gig, but why do we need _**you**_?”

Surprisingly, Suzaku didn't hesitate to answer this question, “I am dedicated to working hard and achieving goals.”

“Eh, wasn't exactly what I was looking for but close enough.” Bender shrugged, “Okay then. Since I am in a good mood and we are in need of some extra fingerprints, what the hell? You're in.”

He was surprised by how quick that took, especially compared to the other interviews he had. Then he said in disbelief, “Really? I'm hired just like that?”

“Well normally, I'd rob you and have those two kick your ass outta here if I didn't want too. I might be a crook, but I'm an honest crook.” Bender told him. “Anyways, I need some extra hands. Since you're apparently hired, you should meet my assistant. Ah there she is now.”

His current assistant walked in the room; Suzaku turned to the right and saw a gorgeous blonde woman walking towards Bender; she was tall and had a smile that almost literally lit up the place (or sky). To him, she was astounding. Down below on the left side of her waist was a badge, and up in her hand was a folder. He knew he saw something like that before, but wasn't able to wrap his head around it. She placed her free hand next to Bender to prop herself up and asked him.

“Bender, do you know where the ginger is? I have a guy tweaking out very bad.”

Bender turned over to Suzaku and introduced each other, “I'll tell you in a minute. Mr. Who ever you are, this is my assistant who does almost everything for me – Detective Alexandra Cabot.”

“You can call me Alex for short.” she said, as she shook your hand.

“So? How about you introduce yourself to us. If you don't mind.”

He forgot to introduce himself long ago when they started talking. So he went into a proper stance, and boldly introduced himself, “I apologize. My name is Suzaku Kururugi. I am pleased to work with you people. It is a pleasure to meet your acquaintance, sir and madam.”

Alex laughed for some apparent purpose. Then she told him, “That is a nice proper greeting. I like that. I don't see it in young folks that often.”

“Now that we've met and all, when can I start working?” he asked Bender.

Swinging around in his chair, he replied, “Eh, you can start today. Get your identification and all that crap, and give it to Cecile. In the meantime, you can take a load off and go into the break room. In there it has all the oil and booze your processor can desire.”

“Don't worry, there's coffee and soft drinks.” Alex added.

“I'm happy to hear that.” Suzaku nodded, bowing slightly. But as he walked out, he had to ask him something important, “I don't want to sound insubordinate, but what does this company actually do in the first place?”

“We create and sell certain products that can be used for the public for private use.” Cecile explained – vaguely.

”What does that mean?” he inquired.

Bender wasted no time as he summed it up, “We're a pharmaceutical company. We create high end drugs that we test and sell to various places.”

“What?!” he shouted.

Cecile walked over to him and directed him to the door, while Bender told him, “Don't worry. As we process your employment, she'll take you the break room so you can have a drink and think it over.”

They walked out of the room, Suzaku started having doubts. He had no idea how he would be able to work for a pharmaceutical company, especially since he has no such training in working, making or have any knowledge with drugs. What used to be a tremendous opportunity for him to help his situation, became something of a problem. But then again, this could be an opportunity for him to try something new. Even this is not the place to do it.

As they were walking down the hall, Cecile stopped him and pulled something out of her jacket. She told him, “Suzaku, I managed to make a little transaction during your conversation with Bender. So here you go, to help you with your problem.”

She tossed a large wad of money into his hands. He had no way of counting how much was in his hand, so he asked, “How much is in here?”

“Three thousand dollars. Just enough to get you through next month. I'm giving you this because you probably won't be paid on the first of the month. So I'm giving you this out of my own pocket, so you can get by. I can't stand to see my friend become homeless.”

Suzaku was in awe, he had nothing to say to her for doing this. He laughed a bit and told her, “I don't know what to say. Thank you. I don't know understand why you're doing this?”

“Because that's what friends do for each other. Don't bother paying me back either. Think nothing of it.”

She walked away, leaving him with the money in his hand. He smiled at her and was amazed at how lucky he was to have people that stuck their necks for him. But as far as the job goes, this shed some light. Perhaps he could provide some type of contribution to this company; though he still had some kinks in this situation, it was up to him to figure out a way.

He sighed and said to himself, “What in the hell did I put myself into?”

 

 


	2. Training Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When Suzaku lands a job at an underground pharmaceutical company, his new boss and co-workers teachs him the tricks and trade, and gives him essential information on how to do his job; he also gets more acquainted to them.

No it was not the next day, or some significant amount of time that went by. In fact, it was less than an hour when Suzaku was hired in order to work out his financial problems. But there was one thing that bugged him – he is now working for a secret, underground pharmaceutical company. It would not be a problem for him if not for the fact that he has no zero experience or education in working with medication. Other than his knowledge of chemistry, that's about it.

This was something he mulled over as he sat in the break room. But like the place itself, the break room was nothing different; however unlike the rest of the place, it seemed the most normal looking place in the entire facility. Suzaku spent a good whole hour having some cups of coffee, as he thought about what he should do to try and keep this job. He was humble that Cecile gave him money to solve his problem at her expense, that was why it was imperative to keep this gig.

He stared blankly at the cupboard, completely ignoring his surroundings. While he enjoyed a decent cup of coffee, Alex walked in the break room. Again, he didn't know that she was there. So she unintentionally stood right beside him. She stood there for a minute or two until he eventually noticed her standing there.

Suzaku snapped into reality and turned over to her. “Oh hello, Detective Cabot. Didn't notice you there.” he said.

“No need to be formal. Just call me Alex. It's simpler that way.” she told him, “So what's your name? Suzaku is it?”

He nodded in agreement. Alex as well nodded and turned away from him. “I see you have yourself a cup of coffee. Did you by any chance eat what was in that fridge?”

He turned around and saw where the refrigerator was standing and replied, “No I haven't. Why?”

“It's mainly because I found out that Bender uses stolen food stamps to pay for the food.” she explained. “It's impossible to eat anything in there without feeling like an ass.”

“That sounds horrible.”

“Well that's how it is.” Alex nodded, “You've been here for a while and we haven't seen you since. We thought you ran off because of what kind of job this is.”

“I'm not the first person who has been pinned for this job?”

“No you're not. In the past several months, I'd say that we've hired about eight different people.” she explained, “I don't quite remember what happened to the last guy. It had something to do with a blow torch and a tractor. That aside, don't be surprised he didn't tell you. Bender has a habit of doing that type of thing.”

“I have some concerns about this place if you like to know. I have zero knowledge about pharmaceuticals, so it may be a bit tough for me to do this job efficiently.”

Alex started laughing for about a good couple of minutes. She was amused by how naïve he was in this situation. He had every right to in fact. “Is that what you're worried about, Suzaku? You must be new to this type of thing. But since you have some problems figuring this stuff out, we'll help you out.”

“How can you help me? Aren't you a detective?”

“Well yes I am. But I am a lot of things to be honest with you.” Alex told him, “But that's not the case. We have a training session where we go over everything that this company has to offer, what we do and how you can do it.”

“You guys aren't creating illicit drugs, are you?”

She chucked whist shaking her head, then explained. “Oh no, we don't make illegal substances. Come on, follow me. I'll tell you everything you need to know.”

While they walked out of the break room, out of nowhere, Bender stood in front of the doorway and said, “Welcome to the Bendco Training Tour. No flash photography during the tour.”

Suzaku followed Alex and Bender out of the break room where they began their tour of the company's facilities, and gave him a detailed description of what they do. This is a mandated training program that Bender put in place so that his employers could do their jobs efficiency. And take our word for it, mistakes and wasting resources resulted in losing money in the end and the one thing that Bender hates, is losing money. Moving on...

Alex guided him back to the the entrance, where she would begin their tour and training. The first thing she started off was her introduction.

“Alright, since we're here. Allow me to begin.” she began explaining, “This before your eyes is Bendco. This a secret company used to develop and create pharmaceutical drugs. The company was founded a few years ago and since then it has had a good amount of success. That's just how it started. Any questions before I continue?”

He looked around and noticed something that caught his attention, to which he addressed, “What is that place over there to your left?”

Alex looked over and realized what he's talking about. So she explained, “That is the stairway that leads to the storage house. Before we ship them out, we keep some of the drugs in there, the rest is held elsewhere in a storage unit in the Bronx.”

She walked over to her right and pointed out something else of interest, “Now this place right here is the burn unit, where we store all failed drugs. Sometimes we aren't always successful when it comes to creating them; it's usually caused by the dangers it brings, or the CDC views them as a danger to the public. So if a drug fails testing, it goes here for disposal.”

“But how do you dispose of them?”

“Since it's hard to dispose of them with environmental nuts hassling us.” Bender explained, “We crush them up into a nice white powder and sell it as baking flour.”

Suzaku couldn't muster up a response to that. However...

“Come over here, this place over here is interesting.”

“How is it interesting?” he asked. Alex opened the door and showed him a large containment room.

“This is where we evaluate the drugs. We spend a good amount of time testing out the drugs we make so that they are effective and safe. We can get in a lot of trouble if we don't test them out.”

“Who do you test them on?”

“Anyone who is willing to participate in the evaluation.” she shrugged. They continued the tour elsewhere, where they lead him further down and shows him something that may be interesting to him. To him actually, as he managed to come across it.

He called over Alex and Bender, asking, “What's this large place right here?”

“That's just a auditorium. Bender brought a lot of robots with him and they need a place to smoke and drink and have a good time, and that's why it's here.”

“Is it restricted to just robots?”

Alex shook her head and said, “Not quite. If you like to use it, then you're welcome too. But focus more on working.”

They walked down the hallway as Suzaku started to noticed something that he felt should be addressed in the first place. So far, the only things he knows about is the auditorium and the two storage rooms. Plus the testing facility. He ran ahead of Alex and Bender so he could tell them what was on his mind.

“I have a question. What you've shown me is interesting,” he explained, “But don't you need to provide studies, do research. You know, science stuff that needs to be taken into account before making certain types of medication?”

They walked back ahead of him and Bender said, “We was just about to tell you about that.”

Alex opened two large doors and quite frankly, the room was self-explanatory. Suzaku looked around and saw all types of scientific tools and supplies. He turned over to Alex and asked, “So this is where you guys perform this type of stuff?”

“Technically no. This is the research center. This is where Lloyd and Cecile performs scientific research and obtains data before we create the drugs.”

“Wow. So are there other scientists that work here?” he inquired.

“Actually no. Apparently Lloyd and Cecile are our only scientists. So they do a lot of work, but they don't seem to care.” Bender noted, “They like it mostly because they're so many things that they can explore. So they do it for the sheer enjoyment, that's why they are our only scientific minds. I don't really care. Less scientists means more money.”

Alex closed the doors and they walked elsewhere across the hall. However Suzaku did ask them another question regarding them, “So they are the only people who creates the drugs?”

“Not necessarily.” she disagreed. “They provide the research that enables us to make them ourselves.”

Not a single word of this was making sense to him at all. “How in the hell can we make medication?” he exclaimed.

“Oh yeah. This is the best part up ahead.” she smiled.

They walked back up and headed up the stairs. They lead him back to Central Office, which didn't make sense at first. But the journey didn't end there, as Alex went to the right towards two revolving doors, so he followed her there. Alex opened the door and walked inside, to which he followed suit. When Suzaku entered the room, it was dark; until Alex turned on the lights and showed him how it's all done.

To his surprise, Suzaku came across a gigantic machine, equipped with computers, robots among others. Alex glanced at it with much pride, while he didn't understand what this thing was. It wasn't any kind of machine he has ever seen in his life. He walked a few steps forward to get a closer look at it, but when he took that fourth step, Bender stepped out in front of him, taking out a cigar and gave them a smug look.

“What is this place?” he asked, in awe.

Bender walked a couple steps forward and answered, “This is where the magic is created!”

“What he really means is this machine right here is Big Ben.” Alex explained, “This is the machine that makes our high quality pharmaceuticals.”

“This machine is extraordinary and thousand of years ahead of all machines in your time.” Bender explained some more, then added as an incentive, “Even _I'm_ more advanced than your machines!”

Although it wasn't hard to understand it; at least through their perspective, none of it was really making any sense to Suzaku at all. He started to wonder if he himself was on some type of substance, because he couldn't understand what was happening.

He tried to summarize it the best way he could, “So let me get this straight. This machine makes all the drugs for the company, yet you need researchers and scientists to do most of the work. Why are there so many pieces in this puzzle that doesn't seem to fit?”

They realized that this made no sense to him at all. Alex took his arm and took him towards the machine and Bender. She explained, “Listen if you would, Suzaku. We do our research _before_ we try to make anything in this thing. You see, this machine can make anything you want it to make. This machine is beyond any machine, device or computer we have on this earth. In order for us to make something efficient, we make sure that we have our cards in place before we try to touch this thing.”

“It's a very simple machine. The professor sent it to me as a way to achieve my goal.” Bender explained further, “You see Big Ben here is not very complex as you think. Any idiot, for instance my best friend, can make a drug that is effective and risk-free.”

“So I can just do a bit of research, then create a pill just like that?” he inquired.

Alex and Bender raised concern over that comment, where they had no choice but to nitpick. “You could do that, however you'd be treading into dangerous ground.” she exclaimed.

“How so?”

“This machine is very simple and easy to work with, but sometimes you need to be careful with what you make. That's why we have testing facilities. But the major downside to this machine is that you don't know what you're gonna get. You could create something that would benefit mankind, or create a deadly supplement that will exterminate half of the world's population.”

Bender laughed at the idea of killing the world's population, to which he added, “As much as I love to hear about killing humans, I don't wanna kill _these_ humans. I know too many people here.”

“Why do you guys make stuff like this, using that thing?”

“Because this machine is a good thing.” Alex replied, “Big Ben can do so much good for humanity. And that's why we use this machine, to break the barriers of medicine and create some hope for mankind.”

Then Bender said frankly, “Me? I just like making money. I love money the same way I love drinking, smoking, stealing and hookers.”

“Don't forget gambling.” she added. Bender laughed a bit in response.

_**~ Later that day ~** _

Suzaku was back in Central Office with Alex and Bender, as they were wrapping up some important business needed. This of which involved Suzaku's employment with Bendco, therefor they needed to finalize his employment. Simple as that. Based on what he's seen, he relatively likes what he has seen believe it or not. Despite the other things about the job, he was reluctant to stay.

Thirty minutes go by as they continued working on the files. He got a bit tense since they haven't spoken in the entire time they've been there, and it was starting to become boring. It was then where Suzaku got a little impatient with them, tapping his foot on the floor, scratching his neck. Things that try to make the time go faster. It was painfully clear that he did not want to sit there any longer, unsure if he actually has the job.

Alex noticed how he was tapping his foot on the floor, but said nothing. Ten minutes later, Suzaku finally works up the courage to ask, “How long are you two going to keep doing this stuff?”

Without taking her eyes off the clipboard, Alex told him, “Do you know what happens to people who are impatient? Their genitals slowly falls off.”

“I don't see how that was appropriate.”

Meanwhile, Bender was doing his share whist drinking a beer. He told him, “Yeah she knows. Now sit down and shut up.”

“Seems fair enough.” he shrugged. For the next few minutes, Suzaku started paying attention to some thing about them, mainly Bender. So he asked him, “Hey, I'm a little curious. I understand that you're a robot, but I don't seem to know much about your origin.”

Interestingly enough, Bender was reluctant to tell him the story... of Bender. This was going to be fun to hear.

“I come from a place a thousand years in the future, where I was built in Tijuana. After spending my time bending, I went out to kill myself. Then I ended up working at a crap delivery company, with my crappy friends. Throughout my days, I robbed, drank booze and hurt people. Mostly jerks. But one day the professor chose me to embark on a indefinite journey into the past, and gave me a machine which I named Big Ben; after my son Ben, who's named after me, Bender. I came here a long time ago, and my mission is to help the past and the future at the same time.”

“Are you kidding me?” he exclaimed. “How can I believe that you are a robot from a thousand years?”

“He's telling the truth, you know.” Alex chimed in, “He and I once traveled into the future. Nice place. But there are a lot of aliens.”

“But who is this “professor” you keep talking about?”

“Who? Professor Farnsworth? He's my boss, the guy who designed all robots like me. He's also the guy who sent me back in the past to do this.

“For what reason?”

“Mainly to improve the future. That's what Bendco is all about. That and money.”

“Okay I get it.” he nodded, then moved his focus to Alex. “So how about you? What's your back-story?”

Though Alex was busy with her work, it didn't inhibit her from revealing a little about herself. “There's a lot to say about me. I've been around the block several times over the years, I was a prosecutor for a while, then at some point I became a cop. I'd rather not bore you with the details, but I've done lots of things. Went to a Ivy school, survive a murder attempt and became a Detective. That's all you need to know about me.”

“Wow. I'm sure your husband must be grateful to have someone like you.”

“I'm not married. I'm all by myself. However, I just happen to be an aunt.”

Suzaku turned his focus back to Bender and asked, “So you said you had a son, is that correct?”

“I don't like talking about it.” he replied.

“You know something, you both are incredibly interesting.” Suzaku told them, “The fact that you guys are unique and interesting. At least half the people I know are jerks. But you guys seem to be different from them in that way.”

They were both pleased and they appreciated his comment. Alex smiled, still not directing her eyes at him and said, “Thank you very much. Alright, I am finished. Bender, how are you doing?”

“I've been finished.” Bender replied, sitting next to a small stack of papers.

Alex got up and gave Suzaku the clipboard she's been working on. “Okay. Everything is all set, now if you just sign here. We'll finalize your employment.” she stated.

He took the clipboard and gave it a good look before he did anything. It was simple and made sense; just a usual contract. Suzaku grabbed the pen from Alex and put down his signature down at the bottom. At least now, his employment is official. Even though he read it line by line, there were some parts in it that were concerning.

“I have a question, there were some parts in it that seemed too vague. What's that about?”

As he received the clipboard from Alex, Bender explained, “It's a confidentiality clause. I don't need people knowing about what's going on here, so I had Alex and your two buddies sign a confidentiality clause so you guys shut your traps. It is very effective.”

“Are you guys even allowed to do this stuff?”

“Yes we are. We are licensed by the U.S. government and the FDA to conduct these studies and research, as well as the creation of many drugs.”

“But don't worry if you don't understand any of this.” Alex told him, “I didn't understand it at first either. Still, you'll do just fine here. So go home and get some rest. You have to be one hundred percent if you plan of going to work tomorrow.”

Suzaku said nothing else and walked out of the chair and exited the office, however he had one more question before he left.

“How will I be able to get inside here?”

Neither Alex nor Bender turned around. But Bender still answered the question, “We've already logged your retinas and fingerprints in our system. Don't ask why, now shut up and get out.”

He nodded and walked out the office for good, leaving them to finish the rest of their work. However there were concerns over this, which Lloyd noticed in the beginning and now Alex was starting to notice as well. It was natural to doubt the decisions you make. She turned over to Bender and asked.

“Are you sure that it was a good idea to hire him?”

Bender stopped his work and told her, “I thought it was a good thing. He needs a job, we need more fingerprints. Besides, I have good faith in this kid. He could be what will turn this company around.”

“Weren't we doing well already?” she inquired.

“Eh. Not well enough. If you didn't notice from your visit to New New York, the future hasn't changed as much. I know he's the one who will change the future.”

Alex turned around and nodded, “Alright then. I've never been able to doubt you. Well, except the very questionable things you've done.”

“Don't worry about a thing. Bender knows what he's doing.” he smirked, smoking a cigar. The wild journey is about to begin. They'll be needing their helmets.

 


End file.
